By The Water
The four types of love named in Greek are agape (self-giving, unconditional love), philia (warm friendship and affection), storge (natural family love), and eros (romantic or desiring love). English flattens all four into one word, “love.” The New Testament uses agape and philia constantly, folds storge into compound words, and never uses eros at all — though it celebrates married love plainly in other terms.
“And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity.”1 Corinthians 13:13 (KJV)
One English word, four Greek ones
English makes us say “I love my wife,” “I love my brother,” “I love my friends,” and “I love bread” with the same four letters. Greek had the vocabulary to distinguish them, and the New Testament writers used that precision deliberately. Learning the four words is the single fastest way to read the Bible's love passages more accurately.
| Agape | Self-giving, chosen, unconditional love — the love God is, and the love commanded of believers. ~116 times as a noun. |
|---|---|
| Philia | Warm affection between friends; loyalty, fondness, brotherly love. Common in the New Testament. |
| Storge | Natural family affection — parent to child, kin to kin. Appears only inside compound words. |
| Eros | Romantic, desiring love. The word never appears in the New Testament, though the reality is honoured (Song of Solomon; Proverbs 5:18–19). |
1. Agape — love that chooses
The New Testament's headline word. Agape is love as a deliberate act of the will, seeking another's good regardless of merit or return: “God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us” (Romans 5:8). Because it is chosen rather than felt, it can be commanded — “love your enemies” (Matthew 5:44) would be nonsense otherwise. It is the love catalogued in 1 Corinthians 13 and the love John identifies with God's own nature: “God is love” (1 John 4:8). Full study of agape →
2. Philia — love that delights
Philia is the love of genuine friendship: shared affection, loyalty, enjoyment of another person. It gives us Philadelphia — “brotherly love” — and the command “be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love” (Romans 12:10). Jesus is called “a friend of publicans and sinners” (Matthew 11:19), and tells the disciples, “I have called you friends” (John 15:15). Where agape decides, philia enjoys. Full study of philia →
3. Storge — love that belongs
Storge is the quiet, unchosen affection of family — the bond that exists simply because these are your people. It never appears alone in the New Testament, but it is embedded in two revealing compounds: philostorgos (“kindly affectioned,” Romans 12:10) and astorgos (“without natural affection,” Romans 1:31; 2 Timothy 3:3) — where its absence is listed among the marks of a society coming apart. Full study of storge →
4. Eros — love that desires
Eros is romantic, desiring love. The word itself never occurs in the New Testament — but the thing it names is treated as a good gift, not an embarrassment. The Song of Solomon is an unblushing love poem inside the canon, and Proverbs tells a husband to “rejoice with the wife of thy youth” (Proverbs 5:18). Scripture's concern is never that desire exists, only where it is aimed. Full study of eros →
Why the distinctions matter when you read
- John 21 stages two of them. Jesus asks Peter “lovest thou me?” using agapao; Peter answers with phileo. The third time, Jesus descends to Peter's word. Whether the shift is emphatic or stylistic is debated — that the passage rewards knowing both words is not.
- Commands become intelligible. You cannot be ordered to feel fondness. You can be ordered to act for someone's good. Knowing that the command is agape resolves the difficulty of “love your enemies.”
- 1 Corinthians 13 stops being sentimental. Read at a wedding it sounds like romance; in Greek it is agape — patient, kind, keeping no ledger — a description of conduct, not feeling.
A note on “the four loves”
The familiar grouping owes much to C. S. Lewis's 1960 book The Four Loves, which organised affection, friendship, eros and charity for modern readers. The four Greek words are genuinely ancient; the tidy fourfold scheme is a later teaching device. Scripture itself simply uses the words as they fit — which is why tracing actual occurrences beats memorising a chart.
Open the word, not just a definition
Search any of these words in By The Water's Word Study tab — agape (G26), phileo (G5368), and their whole family open with definitions, morphology, and every verse where each occurs, so you can see for yourself which love a passage means.
Frequently asked questions
What are the 4 types of love in the Bible?
Agape (unconditional, self-giving love), philia (friendship and affection), storge (natural family love), and eros (romantic love). English uses one word for all four; Greek distinguished them.
Which types of love actually appear in the New Testament?
Agape and philia appear constantly. Storge appears only inside compound words such as philostorgos ('kindly affectioned', Romans 12:10) and astorgos ('without natural affection', Romans 1:31). Eros never appears at all.
What is the difference between agape and philia?
Agape is love as a deliberate choice to seek another's good, independent of feeling or merit — which is why it can be commanded. Philia is the warm affection of genuine friendship. Agape decides; philia delights. Learn more.
Is eros love sinful in the Bible?
No. The word eros never appears in the New Testament, but romantic and physical love within marriage is treated as a good gift — the Song of Solomon is an unembarrassed love poem, and Proverbs 5:18–19 commands a husband to delight in his wife. Scripture's concern is direction, not desire itself.
Are the four loves a biblical idea or C. S. Lewis's?
The four Greek words are ancient and genuine. The neat fourfold scheme is largely a teaching framework popularised by C. S. Lewis's The Four Loves (1960); the Bible simply uses the words as context requires.